I’ve made the decision to become a lot more personal on this blog.
Since I left university last November, I have felt…well…lost.
I was previously employed at a temporary ice rink throughout the Christmas period, but that finished on January 1st. Since then, I have applied to what feels like hundreds of jobs. Unfortunately, I have not been successful in any which I find baffling – I see myself as rather employable.
My mum said that it’s probably due to it just being after Christmas when stores are at their least busy – but I’m not so sure.
I’m continuing to apply to a couple of jobs per day in the hopes that I might just hear from one. I know that none of the jobs are permanent, or what I even enjoy doing. They are simply an income until September. In September I want to either be taking up a degree or apprenticeship in my dream sector. It feels rather scary throwing myself back into retail, it almost feels like I’m a failure, but I know deep down that this isn’t forever, regardless of what anyone else thinks. This is simply to save up the funds to achieve my dreams.
I have kept myself pretty damn positive in such a hard time. I have made note of activities I want to try, clubs I want to join and places I want to visit once I have an income. This keeps me looking forward to the future and drives me on day-after-day.
For example, this morning I looked into joining a rowing club. Rowing is something I have always wanted to try. I nearly took it up 2 years ago when I was enrolled onto a beginners course at Guildford Rowing Club but I changed my mind to kayaking which I slightly regret. When I was at university I tried out the rowing club. Although it was just on ergo machines, we learned the positioning and even had a team race (our team lost, but in my defence, the other team had the muscliest woman I’ve ever seen). The instructor came around and helped us with our positioning, but fortunately, he couldn’t find any faults with mine. A girl who was already on the squad told me that she thought I was pretty damn good. So, I have decided to pursue a sport that I’m rather good at. I have sent an enquiry to Reading Rowing Club, Weybridge Rowing Club, and Guildford Rowing Club.
When in a difficult time, I really recommend making plans for when you’ve left that dark place. Although it’s just as crucial to deal with the problem head on, only focusing on the negativity will not bring you much hope.
I believe that at age 20 I have pretty much mastered the art of being positive no matter what. I wish this is something I could add to my CV as I’m somewhat proud. Well done me.
Edit: I have successfully heard back from two jobs this morning and have an interview booked for one of them. My dad was right, things truly do change quickly.